This is by Deborah Bostic, one of our students who participates in our 6 week Living A Course in Miracles classes.

 

It is early on Sunday morning of the Memorial Day holiday weekend.

There is little to no traffic on the interstate near my home.  I don’t have a radio or the tv playing; no dishwasher, clothes dryer or appliance running; my dog is asleep.  Ah, quiet.

When I finish typing this, I will relax into this chair, close my eyes, take a deep breath and go within.  I will go to that place where there is no traffic, no alarm clock, no stock market, no unemployment number, no government, no medical insurance, no social security, no worries, no cares, no stress, no body.  Just stillness.  Someone once wrote that the mind is like the ocean.  On the top, there is much turbulence and upheaval, but the deeper you go the calmer it becomes.

Often, the ego-chatter will begin the moment I sit down in the chair.

Ego: Hey!  You don’t have time for this.  You have things to do.  Sit here after you get the bushes trimmed, the flowers watered, the laundry done, the bills paid, blah, blah, blah.

Calmness:   I’m smiling at you;  I am beginning to see through you, so have at it.  I am losing faith in you.

Ego:  Huh?  Oh, c’mon.  You don’t really believe that.  Just yesterday we were plotting and planning and figuring what you would do in case you lose your job.  You KNOW you need to count on me to make sure that you are safe.  You and I have a life-long relationship–you know what to expect with me.  That other stuff may or may not be the Truth.  Has that Holy Spirit guy actually talked to you the way I do?

Calmness:  No, but I don’t expect that.  It is a very quiet voice–not a loud, raucous one like yours.  Ya know what, I don’t even want to have this conversation with you.  I am going to be quiet now.

Ego:  K–good luck with that.  Hey, another thing–you have to go over to Sharon’s this evening, and tomorrow you have to…………….

And that goes on for as long as it goes on.  That is okay.  The ego does what it does.  It serves a purpose.  Every unhappiness that we experience is created by the ego.  Every single one.  It’s entire mission is to convince us that we are self-created and can rule the universe better than God.  Living a life under ego’s rule is like creating a very bad science fiction movie that always turns out the same.  We die at the end.

The best way to discover the contrast between stillness and ego speak is to allow yourself to be taken down to that place within where the noise stops.  That is the place where you can hear the voice of the Holy Spirit.  It is a soundless voice that you will understand perfectly.  It is the only safe place there is.  Ego won’t go there.  It is where we belong.

 


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