On some level I believe that I have attacked God in retaliation to what I believe He did to me. Yet, all of that is not true and the only truth that remains is that I love God and He loves me. I cannot destroy what God created. He created me innocent in free. It is me that has imprisoned myself in the terrifying hallways of my mind.
I am sick, my mind is sick that is. Only the mind is sick and needs healed. Father placed the Holy Spirit in my mind as a Comforter to the pain that I made. He remembers God for me and He is linked with Him. Not only am I linked with the Holy Spirit and God but with everyone here in the world. They are me and we are the Son of God.
If I believe that the Son of God could be sick then I believe that God can suffer. Yet, really I do not believe that God can suffer, do I? Love does not suffer, it simply cannot.
I am not to worship the idol of sickness. The idol of sickness is anything that I have made with the ego. God only created love, not these poor substitutes for Him. I placed it all before God, concealing Him from my sight and worshipped what was there standing instead. Intellectually it does not make sense, yet I still at times go about my day and place idols in front of God.
That is not to be guilty by what I do instead I am to be calm in my mind and observe what it is that I do and see that the ego offers me nothing in return. With the ego I may have money, material possessions, scores of friends and adulation yet, I could still be very lonely inside because the things of the world do not make one happy. Once again they are merely illusions and I am in love with nothing.
I honor my Father and I honor His Son. I step back and accept my birthright. I focus on vigilance and not allow the ego to twist my mind into honoring it. I will only find peace in God and nowhere else. In this I am indeed saved.
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