I only attack because of the guilt that is buried deep within. I don’t want to admit the guilt that I indeed wanted specialness from God. When I don’t receive it I behave as a spoiled child. I have everything through Him, so why would I ask for more?
This guilt kept me from accepting myself as God knows me to be. The guilt covers what is true. I just don’t want to believe it. I don’t want to believe something that I have been searching for. How insane is that!
I’m attached to this world ever so slightly without realizing it. Even with the sense of peace, contentment and confidence I seem to have, I can still be swayed when faced with an unexpected situations with tales by the ego telling me God is a cruel Father.
It is not true. The ego’s exaggerations are used to sidetrack me and round and round in circles I go! I have done nothing wrong when I think this way. It is but a mere mistake. This mistake was completely and instantly corrected by God. Whew!
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